The rantings and ravings of the Army life

...and life in general

The Facts:

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I am a nurse, a mother, an Army wife and a National Guard soldier. I love all my jobs and my family. I tend to cry too much, laugh too loud, and make jokes that are offensive. I'm a nature-loving, gym addict, and overall fun person. I hate drama, but I love me some good gossip!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

To party or not to party...

here's the dilemma. I have an infant son, who just turned two on Sunday. I decided that it would be more costly and disappointing overall to throw a party for him. My husband is in training. He has managed to miss his birth, 1st birthday and his 2nd as well. I don't blame him, and my son shouldn't suffer. But here's the deal. We have so few friends left on the island, and most of my friends don't have children. So do I throw a soiree for five people with no kids? Kinda silly. I decided that my son wouldn't know any better and it wasn't going to be as hard to not have my husband there, if we just didn't throw a party at all. But as soon as I started getting questions from friends and family(all out of state... mind you) about whether I was having a party, I started to feel guilty. Why should I feel guilt for not throwing a party or "get together" for a toddler? I think it was kinda overwhelming to think about a party that no one would attend. So I nixed the idea and got grief about it. Why would someone want to make me feel worse about the lack of friends and family I have supporting me here? I am doing all that I can to keep my family sane 6 thousands miles from my closest relative and support system. It is rough as an Army family to still keep traditions and holidays as important as they once were. It appears that we make more of the effort that not. Why? Because we were the ones to move away? That's not fair. Give me a break. I love my son, and my husband, and I feel that a two year old's party, or rather, lack thereof, is not as important as the fact that his family makes that effort to contact him or send him a little gift to show their acknowledgment of his life. I guess some may call it selfish, but I feel like I didn't need a dog and pony show so that people in other states can see pictures of what they missed.
My son got a little cake, gift from us and we had a nice dinner. But apparently that wasn't suffice. Why can't anyone see my point of view? You think this is easy? Well hell, then you try it on!

3 comments:

Meagan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Meagan said...

Dude, I don't think you should feel bad at all!! Obviously the people giving you a hard time don't understand that you just can't go rent a couple of kids for the day to have a party. It's not your fault that you're stuck on an island w/o your husband and all of your friends have moved somewhere else. Fuck em!!!
Oh and by the way...I miss you guys!! :)

Jrzy Army Wife said...

I wouldn't worry about the party. If the punkin bday wasn't at Halloween I prolly wouldn't have a party either. He won't really understand or remember either way. Just demand we all buy gifts and drop them off. Oh wait I already did that.